A hella long rant sorry not sorry

I have always so many ideas of what I want to post about, but I never write down my ideas and then stress takes over so I don't write and then I forget what I wanted to post.

Not to sound like a broken record, but I want to open a discussion about Instagram once more.

I have realised that I get somewhat triggered by these oh-so-perfect-instagram accounts. If they're famous, okay, I get why, but if you're a "normal" young adult, how come you... only post so perfect things? And those amounts of likes. Ugh.

Some of them are young women that've moved to southern Europe, or are backpacking through Europe, and party a lot in fucking Ibiza or whatnot. I don't want to call them out by posting their account names here, bc I know some of them irl, but I've seen enough of perfect tanned bodies with a sunrise tequila and a perfect sunset in the background, and bikinis featuring perfect boobs and perfect crayfish parties and people being social and don't get me started on their oh-so-perfect fashion,

while I'm tired like a zombie, feel like a monster and constantly trying to keep my fucking anxiety away from ruining everything. I see my collegues, fiancé, mum 'n' dad and the teenagers I'm working with (almost) everyday, so I get my fair share of socialization, but

I get so angry at these accounts. That THAT is the life style everyones hungering for. That people get the idea of perfection from these accounts. Ten years back the perfect life style was something featured in magazines and everyone knew they were unaccomplishable, but now, with every other girl (and man) being so unbelieveble beautiful and perfect in every way, the lines of dreaming and actively striving towards that life style are broken.

Luckily, I'm pretty strong against impulses of becoming perfect. My chances of becoming perfect were ruined years ago and I'm not bitter at all.

I've accomplished more than those ah-so-perfect girls anyway. I've got a full time job, heck, I'm getting married within the very near future, I'm having this "perfect" future so close at hand. So who the fuck cares about partying and showing the most beautiful sides of you anyway?

I try to show the real me. Love me or hate me, I never try to be perfect. Not when working, not when being a friend, not when being a lover, not when posing for a picture, never. Because I can't be perfect.