I have thought a lot about one thing, and that is the difference between me when I was 13-15 and 16-18.
13-15 I felt a lot. Too much I'd say. Yes I felt rage and anger and sorrow and the feeling of being hated
but
also the feeling of happiness and the feeling of being in the right place right time, the feeling of having someone who likes you and I remember loving
and even if the latter one was more rarely it was still there. Secondary school wasn't throughout shit, I was the one who was made of shit. My brain and I.
16-18 I don't remember much. ¨
I hate not remebering a shit from upper secondary school. I remember mostly the bad stuff from that time period and now thinking about it, it feels like I solely remember the bad stuff.
The feeling of not having friends who likes you. The feeling of being at the wrong place the wrong time.
I can't remember being happy in upper secondary school. Yes, outside of school, I had hobbies I loved and I guess that was what saved me from going insane, but inside the school I can't remember feeling something.
I hate that it turned out that way.
